Only fools
by punkaxsanchez
Summary: Loss can occur in many ways. Growing up, not really having much of a choice Spencer rebels out at the choosing and falls into a Dauntless arena but now shes not sure of where her future is going and can she bare to loose her loved ones? and whats that seriously hot leaders problem also whats happening to Al.(slow burn)


Disclaimer! : i do not own any of the characters belonging to the divergent trilogy only those that you do not recognize as apart of the divergent trilogy also i own the overall ending plot though my own oc will show up in the original story line every so often.

so this is my first divergent FanFic i hope you like :P

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Loss had to be my biggest fear, the more i thought about the more my heart ached and i couldn't stop the tears from flowing. Nothing had happen but just the thought of it happening caused my body to shake in waves of nausea, sadness and hurt.

My mother slowly walked around the polished, mahogany table and loosely wrapped her arms around my trembling shoulders. "i love you, you know that right." she whispered into my ear. i nodded not trusting my voice enough to say anything, my father had left me and my mother at the table after an argument we had. _"Hope and pray that you are Candor."_ He said, _"otherwise don't expect a visit from me."_ The word struck me like a whip on bare skin and i couldn't stop the tears after that because i knew, i knew i wasn't Candor and there's nothing i could do to help that. Being truthful to others only starts when your truthful to yourself and i didn't want to lie to myself anymore.

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"what was my results." i said sitting up in the chair that resembled a dentists chair, "Dauntless." smiled an Abnegation man. i shook my head and looked down at my hands, "thank you." i spoke meekly before sliding off the chair and out the door. Walking out of the complex i took in a shaking breath as my chest contorted in impending doom, **_im sorry,_** i said to myself running a hand through my hair i looked to the sky and focused on the clouds above for comfort. My father was going to hate me and probably take it out on my mother, Faction before blood after all. "Spence wait up." i spun around to look behind me and saw Albert jogging slowly to reach my side. "hey Al hows it going." i plastered a smile on my face and brushed my hair from my eyes. "good, what did you get on your test?" he asked out right, catching me off guard for a brief second, then i smiled wider "What did _you_ get." i replied cheekily and he chuckled, his smile spreading across his face, "i see how it is." he nodded another chuckle escaping his throat. "How what is?" i asked innocently fluttering my lashes, "did you want to hang out today." he asked nudging my shoulder with a wink and i nodded in agreement. "It sounds a lot more tempting than enduring my dads interrogations." i said before we began to wander in a mindless walk, "Hey don't worry if he doesn't visit then it just proves hes failed in both parenting and guidance." Al smiled teasingly and i couldn't help the bubble of laughter that flew from my mouth "Don't say that to loudly he might hear you." i giggled and he chuckled throwing an arm over my shoulders i wrapped my arm around his back and we continued on our dwardling walk through the city.

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As night fell me and Al sat on top an abandoned building looking out into the city watching the light sparkle. "You know. no matter what you choose tomorrow ill be there for you." he said i nodded and sighed looking to the sky. "Al your the best friend Ive ever had, and, and i don't know what id do if i lost you." i said setting my truth free into the night air, i herd a shifting next to me and i turned to look at Al, his face inches from mine, "you'd probably go crazy and kill everyone." he chuckled, i could feel his warm breath on my face and it sent a shiver down my spine. "yeah, i probably would." i breathed and my head began to move on its own closer to his, "we probably shouldn't." i said quietly he nodded barely "yeah probably." he whispered back and we both pulled away and stood. "well ill catch you round then." he said smiling to me and throwing his messenger bag over his shoulders, i shrugged and shoved my hands into my blazer pockets "yeah, Probably." i replied waving through my pocket as he turned to leave.

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Sitting in between my mother and father my leg jutted nervously and i felt the slap of my fathers hard hand on my knee forcing it to still. "Spencer Wells." my heart jumped at my name and i stood glancing side ways at my father as he moved to let me out of the line, i nodded to him and my mother before descending the stairs and walking to the choosing table. Pausing momentarily in front of the faction Representative bowls i snatched the silver knife and cut the palm of my hand, before the blood could fall i quickly placed my hand over the Dauntless bowl and watched a drop fall and sizzle on the coals. Roaring of cheers exploded behind me and i turned around feeling a weight drop off my shoulders, i knew what this meant and i wanted it more than anything. Shifting my head up to my mother and father i saw as his glare bore into me and his fists clench, i shook my head and made my way over to the roaring group of dauntless, no more was i going to be held down by his abusive ways.

"Well come initiate." i smiled as a man took my free hand and gave it a firm shake, motioning to a now free chair the man handed me a plaster and i took my seat, feeling pats and grips of enthusiasm on my back and shoulders the giddiness of my decision over whelmed me and i relished in the energy of my new faction.

The choosing ended rather quickly after that and i found myself running out of the hub in laughter and happiness, "Spence!" i herd a male voice yell from behind me and i turned to see Al "Al!" i cried in excitement "C'mon" i waved to him to catch up and before i knew it we were standing at the bottom of the rail road support beams. Al puffed behind me and looked up as we watched a Dauntless born initiate climb the poles, "Ladies first." he smiled breathing out a chuckle i giggled and reached up to make my first grip, Strong hands gripped my waist and i felt myself rise up higher in a swoop where i reached my second hand out to balance myself. with my feet securely on a rung i looked down at Al his hands held up "Thanks" i smiled and made my way up to the top coming to crawl on a platform, shuffling on my knees to face Al i reached down and helped him reach the top. We both stood on the platform and took in the scene of people jumping and running in cheers of wild freedom, looking from side to side i spotted out of the corner of my eye a train heading towards us. A clear hush fell over the group and then a whew shout sprouted up, our legs were moving at a fast pace and i spotted people jumping into the open doors of the train. **_All or nothing._** i thought to myself and prepped myself to jump into the nearest door coming up, _**1...2...3.**_ Energizing my legs i propelled myself forward and landed tummy down in the train. My heart raced as i realized what i had just done, i giggled to myself and looked around the cabin. My eyes came to rest on a plain set of dark, solid looking, large boots, and i jumped to my feet wobbling slightly at the movement of the train. My gaze following from the boots slowly moved up to dark slightly baggie pants and then a heavy firm looking jacket zipped to the neck with a sharp thick collar. _**My god...**_ i thought as i swallowed the lump that formed in my throat, my brown eyes coming into contact with deep grey eyes under a dark gaze. the man in front of me snorted and clasped his hands in front of him with his legs spread shoulder length apart, my mouth ran dry as i studied his face, a firm double pierced brow hooded over beautiful, deep, grey eyes, and a strong jaw defined the lower half of his face with soft looking flat lined lips. On his neck were tattooed, thick, vertical lines either side of his Adams apple that disappeared under his coat. sucking in a silent breath my bottom lip found itself between my teeth as i unconsciously bit down on it, A heavy hand on my shoulder snapped me from my daze and i looked up with a venom poised glare, "Chill Spence." Al face smiled gently down at me as his finger pushed a stray hair from my face, "Sorry." i beamed back my stare dissolving into a smile. the sudden feeling of being shoved forward into Al knocked the breath from me, i turned on quick feet only to see the quickly retreating back of the man fly out of the train onto a roof. "Jump Spence, jump" Al nudged me gently and i ran after the man flinging myself out of the train followed by Al, Landing on my feet the force of the jump caused by body to fly forward and i stumbled for a second before gaining my balance back. I laughed and turned around to see Al pick himself up off the ground, i laughed at that too and ran to him "Holy cow." i exclaimed and looped my arm in with his tugging him along to where everyone seemed to be gathering. "Holy cow is right." he laughed back at me, the crowed hushed and we looked forward at the man who shoved me into Al, "Jerk." i whispered to Al and he stifled a giggle.

"listen up." the man started "I'm Eric, im one of your leaders, if you want to enter Dauntless this is the way in, and if you don't have the guts to jump then you don't belong in Dauntless" after his name i tuned him out and began to take in my surroundings the wind blew across my face and i herd a whew whispers through out the crowd. My attention was brought back to an abnegation girl who had stood herself up on the ledge of the terracotta and brick railing, and my hands tighten around Al's large forearm in anticipation for her jump. In the blink of an eye she was gone and slowly more people followed her till it was only me and another girl left, "Well, whose it going to be." Eric's large frame shifted weight from one leg to another as he waited his frown only growing deeper as the seconds flew by. Huffing forcefully to myself i flew onto the ledge in one easy leap knowing that i shocked the leader in my sudden haste taking a deep breath i aimed me fall and leaned forward into a free fall down, the air whistled past me tearing at my clothes and the air in my lungs, the only thing i could hear was the blood pumping through my veins and the only thing i could feel was the drop in my gut as i fell. Closing my eyes i wait for the impact of solid ground, expecting to die only to land not so gently in a net and have the air knocked from my chest.

Praying to who ever it was for the lovely net i was suddenly bought out of my rush by a tan man with deep brown eyes and sandy brown hair. "I take it he threw you off." his smooth voice rang in my ears and i laughed while he helped me down "No, i kinda threw myself off." i spoke while straightening my clothes out, "My names four, yours." The man cut the banter and stared intently into my eyes "uh, Spencer." i soberly replied and slightly shrank back against the group. "32nd jumper, Spencer" a roar from the shadows emitted and i jumped slightly at not having noticed them before. behind me a hand gripped my arm and slowly pulled me backwards till i was next to Al my familiar best friend. "What took you so long," he whispered and i looked up into his big kind face with a cheeky smile. "i had a lot to repent." he laughed and a whew others listening in shared a giggle. "Dauntless born follow Lauren, the rest your with me." the man known as four spoke before moving off into a tunnel.

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 **Thanks for reading its my second attempt at writing a fan fic and i don't know how it is so feel free to leave constructive criticism and praises if you think its worth that ^^**


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